Would you do it?

I am gonna be honest with you all and you have to promise not to judge me. If you have followed my monthly expenses you will notice that I have a “gift” section in my income category. If you have paid close attention to this section you will notice about every other month I receive around $400 to $500. I have been waiting for someone to ask why I was consistently getting these gifts. No one did, but I’m gonna tell ya anyways. 

The gifts are from, none other than, Mama Ninja. That’s right bloggers, I openly accept gifts from the bank of mom and dad. Before you jump to conclusions, hear me out. As you can see from my side bars, I have a decent chunk of student loan debt. Upon graduating, Mama Ninja told me she would pay back about $4K of my student loans. Instead of giving me one lump sum she is giving me a couple hundred dollars here-and-there. Every dollar she has given me thus far has gone straight to the school loan.

Now on to the debate…

On other PF blogs, I have read about people that refuse to take money from their parents, some who have even bashed those who do. I think those people suck. I agree it is not smart to be dependent upon our parents as we grow older, but I see no problem in accepting generosity. My parents are not financially straining themselves to pay down my loan. They give me the extra cash flow at their discretion, but there are never any strings attached. I do not include this gift in to my budget, as every dollar given to me goes straight to Sallie Mae. I just don’t see a problem with this.

Am I a spoiled brat for taking Mama Ninja’s money? If your parents wanted to help you out, would you let ’em? What are the downsides to taking the money? I really can’t think of a good reason to turn the money down (outside of being a prideful male that wants to do everything on his own).

p.s. No bashing Mama Ninja allowed ’cause she reads my blog, I love her, and I’ll come punch you in the face if you do 🙂

11 thoughts on “Would you do it?

  1. The typical reasons are:
    1. If your parents are in financial trouble or debt and can't help themselves, it doesn't make any sense to "bail you out"
    2. Possible strings attached, if they pay your debt, they may expect you to do other things for them
    3. You are the one who created this debt and you should pay it off
    4. If you don't learn to hold up your own weight and pull through, how can you really start living your own life?

  2. Awww, Mama Ninja…that's cute. 🙂 I don't think it's bad at all that your Mom wants to help out with student loans. My boyfriend's parents are doing the same thing right now – they paid for their other kids to go to college so they feel kind of bad and are giving him $300 per month. I would do this for my children….I think most (good) parents want to help give their children the gift of education. Props to Mama Ninja!!!

  3. Just for more information.
    1)Our income level is much different from what it was when Debt Ninja was in school. We help all our baby Ninja's out in different ways and Debt Ninja wanted his to go to student loans. 2)There are strings attached, a very long string of family and being there for each other.
    3)Debt Ninja is paying it off, we give the money for any purpose and he chooses to pay down debt, the other Ninja's don't use theirs in this method.
    4)Debt Ninja does pull his own weight and if he did not the gifts would stop coming. We believe in helping those that have helped themselves.

    And last, Thanks for having my back Debt Ninja!

  4. I love the name Mama Ninja. I envision this little lady doing some karate kicks and protecting you from all evil debts 🙂

    I accept presents from the folks, it's not always money. Occasionally my dad will buy me a ton of stuff at Walmart or Target. I figure it costs him $400 each time he buys me stuff, but it really makes him happy. I AM still his little kid even though I'm supposedly grown up.

  5. As long as BabyNinja is not taking the money and living off of it instead of getting his own big-ninja job, I'm all for it. And I'm sure in return, BabyNinja will return the favor when MamaNinja is old and grey.

  6. Okay, Mama Ninja is just awesome! Go Mama!

    And honestly, if I had parents would who do this I would be thrilled. My mom passed away when I was 19, and I've GIVEN my dead-beat dad more money than he has ever given me (including giving him a place to live for 6 months – a HORRIBLE 6 months I might add). So I'm *jealous* that you have such an awesome Mama Ninja watching your back. =D

  7. First off, I've been reading your blog for awhile but this is my first post. You are totally awesome. I love the graphics, colors and content on your site.

    I think if parents can help out financially, then why not? They're not doing it forever and it was an agreement that you and your parents had. I can't think of many who turn down the opportunity to have their student loan debt reduced. Mama Ninja seems pretty cool.

  8. MomNinja is awesome 🙂 She seems calm, possessor of good sense of humor and everything.

    My mom is somewhat different. She's very nervous, she's very preoccupied about me. This is why I always tell her I'm fine. I always tell her I don't need money, even if I do. She doesn't belive. And this is not (only) mother heart talking, that's luck of trust. When I'm okay she doesn't believe me either, she always thinks I'm in trouble.

    There's another reason why I try not to receive help from her: she's eager to use it to manipulate me, i.e. say some time later: "I had to give you money, because you can't be independent, you have to rely on me".

    Sometimes I do accept help from her, though. For example, some months ago when I was visiting my hometown I let her pay some of my expenses and give me some money. Why? Because five years have passed since I moved, because she's really worried, because she's changed her ways a bit, because she treats me more like an adult now, because she needs to know I'm fine. I really didn't like to accept money from her, but I did, to give her the feeling that I was secure, safe and sound, that she was needed, that she was strong and could help her daughter.

  9. As long as you show your parents love and show thanks in return there's absolutely no problem with it. (but only if they have extra funds put away for themselves)

    Also, I'd rather not send my parents to a retirement home. I know they would be hurt if I did (as if I'm tossing them out of my life), and in my culture it doesn't happen very often.

    So I think of it this way: they take care of you when you're growing up, you take care of them when they're growing old. Nobody owes anybody anything. If you really love your family (and it doesn't cut into living expenses) then I don't see why not.

  10. I think that it's fine! Even though I usually pay for myself, my mom often will pay more than her fair share of a restaurant check or something like that, especially lately because she knows I've had some big expenses in recent months. It makes my mom happy to be able to help out her kids, as I'm sure it makes MomNinja happy to help you! Nothing wrong with the arrangement!

    Now, as another commenter said above, if the "gift" comes with a whole bunch of strings attached, it's not really generosity and it's more like buying control – I think that's when a lot of bloggers say it's a bad idea, or if it was detrimental to your parents' financial situation.

  11. A debt management plan is one option for breaking free of unsecured debts. You would work with a third party who would get in touch with your creditors and work out a plan for you to pay back the money you owed over a period of time, usually with reduced payments. Once you have gone into the deal creditors will not be on your back for payments and if you stick with the plan you will have become debt free once the term of the plan has been reached.

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