John Doe writes in…
Ninja! I read your blog everyday, it’s awesome! I recommend it to everyone I talk to… My fiancé and I have been together for 6 years and recently became engaged. We have lived together the last 3 years. We are really interested in buying a house. We are getting married in September. Should we wait until we are married to buy a house? Why?
We are both 24 years old. No credit card debt, 2 car payments that will be paid off within 4 months, and I have student loans I am punching. We live in a small Texas town so housing prices are a little different then what you have in Seattle.
Let me know what you think.
Don’t do it!!!!!
How’s that for telling you what I think? Haha! I guess I should preface this post with the reminder that I love me some Jesus. As a result, I do my best to follow his teachings. Back in October 2009, I wrote a post titled “Leave me alone, I don’t want to live with my girlfriend.”
Marriage to me is a pretty big deal. I didn’t want to play the part until I was actually married. That means, even though Girl Ninja and I dated for 4.5 years, we never had sex, slept in the same bed together, went on trips together, etc previous to getting hitched. This also means, I didn’t think it was appropriate for us to start combining our finances until we were legally a family. Her money was her money, and my money was mine, until legally we became one family unit.
Okay, so those are my personal convictions and since I was asked for my opinion I thought I would share them. That said, I don’t live under a rock, and I realize people don’t necessarily value my values. Regardless of my personal moral convictions, I would recommend you hold off buying a home. Here’s why…
- The possibility exists that the wedding day never comes. It’s probably a small chance, like not-even-1%, but it’s still a possibility. Until you’ve said “I do.” nothing is official. You’ve waited all this time, another seven months isn’t going to kill you. No one wants to own a home with an ex-fiance.
- I don’t foresee house prices or interest rates changing dramatically by fall. Sure prices could go up a bit, or interest rates my raise half a percent or so, but I don’t think there is going to be a huge change. I’m far more concerned about the layout, condition, location of our future house than I am about a 3.5% vs 4% interest rate.
- You live in Texas, and as you mentioned, it’s a different market than Seattle. I remember being on business in Houston seeing some AWESOME homes for sale for like $120,000. It boggled my mind. My understanding is the market it also a little more stable than Seattle (not as many ups and downs). If a house bumps up from $120,000 to $126,000 (a 5% spike) in the next year, that will have a negligible effect on your monthly payment.
- You still have other debt. Granted it doesn’t sound like it’s an overwhelming amount. But if you wait to buy a house AFTER you’ve paid off your cars (and/or student loans), you should qualify for a larger mortgage. Maybe this would afford you the opportunity to buy a better house in a better neighborhood? I plan on skipping over the “starter home” neighborhoods and buying something we could be happy with for the long-term. Real estate transactions are expensive, so the less of them you have, the more equity you get to keep.
- Why do you want to buy a house now so badly? Is there something I’m missing that makes buying today a better decision than buying tomorrow? Try and keep emotions out of the house hunting experience. Wait on a great property. You should be comfortable buying a house two years from now if that’s how long it takes to find a place that meets your standards. I’ve been saving our down payment fund for five years now, it’s been a very slow, methodical, and intentional process.
As I always say when I throw out my two cents, I’m just one person, with one opinion. You have to do what you think is best for you.
Let’s see what some other PDITFers have to say. Would you buy a house with your significant other prior to tying the knot? Why or why not?