Fill in the _______.

Get excited y’all cause it’s time we participate in a little “get to know each other” exercise today. You remember those pesky elementary school quizzes where your teacher would give you a sentence that had a blank space in the middle of it? You were suppose to pick which word completed the sentence. Well, I figured we could bring out the 3rd grader in us, and do something similar (but way less sucky). Whadya say…are you down like a clown from China town? Please read the following paragraph.

Hi, my name is blank. I currently work at blank and make around blank per year. I really blank my job. The scariest thing to me about personal finance is blank. If I had a financial do-over I would go back and blank. One thing most people don’t know about me is blank. I think that blank is/are the coolest thing since sliced bread. When I fart, it smells like blank and sounds like blank. Twenty years from now, I think America will be blank. The most non-mortgage debt I’ve ever had was blank and today I have blank amount of debt. If I won blank dollars right now, I would go out and blank. Okay, enough of this silly paragraph, it’s time I go blank so I can blank.

Now, copy and paste that paragraph in the comments section below and replace all the blanks with words of your choice. You can fill out as much (or as little) of the paragraph as you want. Here’s my completed fill in the blank…

Hi, my name is Ninja. I currently work for your Uncle Sam and make around $73k per year. I really enjoy my job. The scariest thing to me about personal finance is buying a house. If I had a financial do-over I would go back and not have majored in Psychology. One thing most people don’t know about me is I am a horrible swimmer. I think that calculator watches are the coolest thing since sliced bread. When I fart, it smells like hot garbage and sounds like psfsfsssffbluuuuwawawafffsst. Twenty years from now, I think America will be wishing we were China. The most non-mortgage debt I’ve ever had was $28K and today I have NO debt. If I won $500 dollars right now, I would go out and put it in the bank because I’m lame. Okay, enough of this silly paragraph, it’s time I go look at Google maps so I can figure out where I want to go this weekend.

Your turn….


p.s. If you liked this idea, feel free to steal it and do something similar on your blog. If you didn’t like this idea, then you must have no soul.

You’re doing it wrong

I was sinking my teeth in to a book (Hard to Believe by John MacArthur) last night and couldn’t help but use some of what I read in today’s blog post. But first a little about the book… “This book is MacArthur’s unflinching, unapologetic, treatise on the modern tendency to alter the true message of Christianity in order to meet the whims and desires of a culture hoping for non-confrontational messages, easy answers, and superficial commitments.”

Don’t worry non-Christians, today’s post isn’t going to be uber spiritual (although I have no problem admitting I love me some Jesus). That said, I do think there was at least one message communicated in Hard To Believe, that applies to everyone, and that message my friends is this: We suck.

Here are three aspects of my life in which I suck…

Christianity:

Ha, more religious blabbering. In recent years, Christianity has become extremely political. One church says “Do this” another “Do that.” So what do I end up doing? Nothing. I become stagnant because no one (or no church) seems to know what the heck they are talking about. The political aspects of Christianity are unbearable. Fortunately, I have a solution to this problem. If I deny myself  (meaning I get out of my own way), Christ will work in me. And if you deny yourself, Christ will work in you. Multiply this by the entire Christian population and suddenly there are no more church politics. Everyone will be on the same page, because everyone will be on Christ’s page. Unfortunately, we tend to do just the opposite. We deny Christ and inflate ourselves. If Christians stopped sucking, the world would be a better place. Period.

Finances:

Of course finances was going to make the list 🙂 After all, this blog is called Punch Debt In The Face and not Punch Christians In The Face. I make terrible financial decisions daily. Yesterday’s was spending $8 at Burger King, when Burger King should have paid me $8 to eat that garbage (I know what you’re thinking…who goes to Germany and eats Burger King?).

Personal Finance is going to be a part of my life as long as I’m alive. It’s in my best compound interest to learn as much as I can and be proactive. Don’t be fooled, getting out of debt is NOT enough. In fact, it’s just the tip of the iceberg. If you become stagnant or lazy in regards to your personal finances, you should expect nothing but stagnant results. Intentional saving/spending/investing/giving is the only way to ensure success.

Health:

I’d like to pretend that I’m really healthy, but something inside me says that would be a lying…especially since I just finished a bottle of Coke. Being healthy, when you really think about it, is quite simple. Eat foods that won’t kill you and work out a few times a week. That’s it. But why are those two simple tasks so hard to do? My hunch is that it’s a lack of discipline. I think this is particularly true for those of us that are naturally skinny. I can eat just about anything I want and exercise sporadically without really packing on any extra weight. It’s one of the perks of being young. I trick myself in to thinking I’m being healthy, just because I’m not overweight. But I know as I age, and my metabolism starts to slow down, I will have to make some adjustments to my diet and my activity level if I want to stay trim. What’s that phrase again “The road to hell is paved with good intentions”, well in this case…”The road to a heart attack is paved with fast food and Dr. Pepper.”

Alright, I’ve been honest with you all, now it’s your turn to be honest with me. What are some aspects of your life that you admittedly “suck” in (relationships, organization, faith, money, etc)? What are you doing to try and suck less? Why are the easiest things sometimes the hardest to do?

I’m moving!

Ahhh, no time to post today as I’m loading up boxes and putting them in the back of my 16′ rental truck. CRAZY! Next time I blog, it will be from Seattle! Woohoo!!! Just to keep things interesting, I want to see who can guesstimate how much gas will cost me for the trip. Are you up for the challenge? Here are a few facts to get you started….

1) 16′ rental truck from Budget Truck.

2) Chuck Norris can do a hand stand….with his feet.

3) Truck will be 80ish% full.

4) I had a mole that looked like a third nipple.

5) The truck takes regular unleaded gas.

6) I will be driving roughly 1,302 miles.

7) The truck has a 35 gallon tank

8) I like the color blue

9) I will be towing my 2 door coupe behind the truck.

10) Website says truck gets between 6-10 mpg.

Alright, those should be enough facts for you to make a reasonable prediction as to what my total gas bill will be. My guess is $762.60.

I’d like to pretend that I’ll give the closest commenter a sweet prize like an iPad 2, but let’s be honest, if I could get my hands on an iPad 2 I’d keep it for myself 🙂 So the winner, instead, will have to enjoy a virtual iPad…

So reader, how much do you think I’ll be spending?

San Francisc-oh yeah!!

I’m super pumped right now. Girl Ninja, and I are playing grown ups and traveling to San Francisco this weekend (I don’t know why, but I still feel too young to vacation without a chaperon). We get in early Saturday morning and will have through Monday night to take in all the city has to offer.

I think I’m especially excited because I fought my urge to be Planny Mcplannerson. Shoot, I don’t even have a budget set for our weekend. How ya like them apples financial responsibility!?

My guess is we’ll spend most of our time seeing awesome places and eating at awesome restaurants. Girl Ninja will probably want to participate in some awesome shopping, and I will probably want to sleep-in until awesomely late. I could care less what we do, as long as we have an awesome time. Get it? Got it? Good!

Awkward Transition…

On another note. I passed the final physical fitness test for my dream job and will be receiving my final offer any day now. In case you are wondering, I threw up three separate times during the test, one of which consisted of crazy gross projectile vomiting. But hey, good things never come easy right?

Girl Ninja and I have done much discussing about which path we will take (dream job or dream location) and although we still aren’t sure, we’ve committed to making the decision by Monday. Ultimately we have been praying that the Lord (as in God, not the flying spaghetti monster) will give us like-mindedness and peace about our future. We literally have no clue what we are going to do, but I know that God does, and that my friends gives me hope 🙂

Although this process has been stressful, we’ve been able to learn so much more about ourselves and our relationship. This is a VERY SIGNIFICANT weekend for us. Expect an update next week.

A second awkward transition…

I just wanted to give a special shout out to my Canadian commenters. Booya for Canada….the junior varsity version of  the U.S…. just kidding… kind of.

I’d like to pretend that I’m going to respond to more comments, but the fact of the matter is I probably wont. For two reasons….

1) I’m kind of lazy.

and

2) Sometimes I get way more comments than I know what to do with. While this is a great problem to have. I’d be totally lying if I said I would be responding to all of them. Heck, I got 70-something comments on my article about cell phones this week. It would take me like three hours to lay out a detailed response to each comment made.

That said, please don’t stop commenting! It’s the only metric I have to gauge your interest in what I write about. Although I don’t always respond, I SWEAR I READ EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM.

Random fact about me….

I had a mole underneath my left nipple, that I thought looked like a third nipple. I was so embarrased by it, I asked my parents to let me have it surgically removed when I was a kid. Thankfully they obliged, I am proud to say, I’ve been third nipple free for 12+ years now 🙂

What’s a random fact about you?

Ask a kindergartner

As most of you know, Girl Ninja is a kindergarten teacher. Eight hours a day, five days a week, she’s busting her butt to try and make these kids less dumb smarter. Somehow, I’ve managed to convince her that we (meaning punch debt in the face readers) should be given access to her students.

No, we won’t be visiting her classroom in person. That’s right, we have an opportunity to pick the brains of a five year old. Well, not literally pick, that would just be weird. All you have to do is take a second to think about a question you would want to ask a five year old. Once you got it in mind, post it in the comments section below.

I’ll select the ten questions I find most interesting and give them to Girl Ninja. She will then host a group discussion with her students. She’ll ask the question we provided, and write down her kindergartners’ responses. I’d ask them to write their responses, but we’d probably end up with something like this…

I’ll then sift through some of the best, craziest, most awesome responses and post them up here for the world (and by ‘the world’ I mean the couple thousand people that read this blog) to see. Obviously I wont be able to use every question, so don’t be bitter if yours isn’t asked.

Some example questions would be, “How much money do you have to have to be rich?” or “What is the primary job of the president’s wife?”

What you can’t do is ask something super creepy like “If I had a large, dirty van with the words ‘free candy’ written on it, would you go inside?”

I’m hoping to post the responses by the end of the week, or early next week. So reader, what question do you have for a kindergartner?

Businesses you’ve never heard of

Saw this article on Yahoo Finance about million dollar businesses you’ve never heard of and thought it was worth sharing with you all. If you want the full details about each gig you’ll have to click over to the article, but here’s the gist…

1) Geese Police Dogs chase geese off golf course. Revenue: Estimated $2.5 million in 2010

2) Texas Driving Experience – Drive a corvette around a racetrack. Revenue: Estimated $1.8 million in 2010

3) Mabel’s Labels – Durable kid proof labels for kids’ stuff. Revenue: $4 million in 2009

4) Stave Puzzle – Really hard puzzles. Revenue: $2.5 million in 2009

5) Pet Relocation – Relocate any animal from point A to point B. Revenue: Estimated $4 million in 2010

6) Black Socks – Sock subscription (like a magazine subscription) Revenue: $5 million in 2009

7) Sky Zone – Trampoline gym. Revenue: $3 million-plus in 2009

8) DNA 11 – DNA artwork. Revenue: $1.4 million in 2009

9) Murray Associates – Spy stuff. Revenue in 2009: $760,000

10) The Fiero Store – Auto parts for Pontiac Fieros. Revenue: $2 million in 2009

How can you read that article and not feel at least somewhat entrepreneurial? I mean come on, who woulda thought teaching some dogs to chase geese would turn in to a multimillion dollar business? Wanna know what’s even cooler? The start up cost for Geese Police was a measly $3,000. Incredible right!? I’m keeping my fingers crossed Punch Debt In The Face will make it on Yahoo’s list next year 😉 Haha, yeah right.

Here’s your mission today. Drop a line in the comments below with what your dream business would be? It doesn’t matter if you know the business would fail, or if the start up costs are too high. This is hypothetical, so we just get to pretend everything would work out somehow. I’d probably start a cereal bar, much like a Starbucks or a Einsteins Bagels, but with cereal instead (side note: I know there are already such places, but not where I live). You walk up to the counter and take your pick of hundreds of different types of cereal. A bowl would cost $1.50 and you could get any type of milk (or soy product) you wanted to go with it. Maybe I’d call it something cheesy like Seriously Cereal. Ah yes, that would be my dream. What’s yours?

Flipped a coin

I flew to Seattle last night with Girl Ninja so we could be with family and friends during the Christmas holiday (side note: we grew up 15 minutes away from each other in Washington, but didn’t meet until we were both in college in San Diego). During the flight, I was faced with a very difficult decision…

Do I blog or watch Toy Story 3?

Well I flipped a coin, and let’s just say Buzz Lightyear came to my rescue. This means I have no blog post for you today. It’s super late and I’m super tired so I’m just gonna post up one of my favorite YouTube videos (makes me laugh every time) and hope it satisfies your PDITF appetite (you gotta wait til about 40 seconds) 🙂

If you want to post a link to your favorite video in the comments below I’d love to see it!!!! Have a good Wednesday ya’ll!!!