10 random questions.

July 2, 2010 · 13 comments

So I moved in yesterday. It was a biotch. The elevators to my complex were shut down due to some epoxy spraying on the ground level. This means I made about Eleventy-billion trips up and down six flights of stairs to get my ‘ish moved in. My back is sore, my legs are tired, I’m hungry, I need a bottle, and I want someone to come put me down for a nap.

Needless to say, I don’t have the energy to blog right now, so instead I searched the internetz for 10 random questions. Here’s what I found…

Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist but a person who drives arace car not called a racist?

Why is the man who invests all your money called a ‘broker’?

Do bald men wash their head with soap or shampoo?

What hair color do they put on the driver’s licenses of bald men?

Why are the obituaries found in the “living” section of the newspaper?

Are one handed people offended when police tell them to put their hands up?

How can sweet and sour sauce be sweet and sour at the same time?

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks
so I wondered what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?

If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?

What if you’re in hell, and you’re mad at someone, where do you tell them to
go?

Pretty tricky questions huh? Have any clever responses to any of them? Or have any other questions we should ponder during our 4th of July weekend? Drop ‘em in the comments below!

HAPPY ALMOST INDEPENDENCE DAY. USA, USA, USA!!!!!!!!!

1 mary m

why do we park in a driveway? and drive on a parkway?

2 Lola

Ha ha – enjoyed your summary of Moving Day fun and torture. And just think, you’ll be moving even more stuff in very soon. It makes me treasure my (not moving anytime soon) middle age life even more.

You posed some very thought-provoking questions – can’t say I have any answers for them. My advice is that, sometimes, it’s best to let the mystery be.

But I did see this headline somewhere on a website that might answer the last question:

“Welcome to Hell – here’s your vuvuzela!”

3 stephan

I was just wondering how it was possible for your back to be “soar”

4 PunchDebt

evidence of a very long day :)

5 Aury (Thunderdrake)

Brokers are called brokers…

Because they’re usually broker than you.

D:

6 Brian

Ever have a jumbo shrimp?

7 Jimmy Dean

I’ve got your answers, and since I ruined most of them, another question.

Pianist – because the profession is to drive the car, not race. So they are drivers.

Broker – Intermediary between you and a finance company

Bald men – personal preference, when my hair is cut short I use both

Bald DL – their natural hair color, which can be verified by a prejudiced TSA agent

Obits – Honors who they were when they were living

One hand – I’ve wondered how they are cuffed, but they would be told to keep their arms in the air

Sweet and sour – Because we have more than one taste bud

Chinese Chopsticks – wouldn’t need a smaller size, just smaller portion. But, chopsticks do some in all sizes.

FedEx/UPS? – UPSex

Hell – I thought that’s where f***off came from

Did Noah have termites on the ark? Woodpeckers?

8 Freckles

Why does your nose run, and your feet smell?

9 Mneiae

I can answer the chopsticks question. They just use normal, adult-sized utensils. When the baby eats soft foods, like applesauce, they use spoons.

10 eemusings

I can answer a couple…

We don’t put hair colour on our licences.

Sweet and sour are different flavours.

11 JoeTaxpayer

We agree the opposite of Pro is Con.
So it follows the opposite of progress is…..

12 Budgeting in the Fun Stuff

Hahahaha!

13 Budgeting in the Fun Stuff

Why is there brail on drive-through ATM’s?

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